The wedding planning process is one of your first BIG tasks together as a couple. It can be both exciting and stressful. In some cases, your groom may not have an opinion at all about a decision, which can either be a relief or be discouraging. In other cases, your fiance may have a strong opposing opinion, which can also feel frustrating. Throughout this journey that you’ll navigate together, effective communication is my biggest piece of advice.
Here are different ways to navigate this time:
Begin by discussing your budget and being real about numbers. In some families, this is a necessary boundary to help guide your process.
Sit down at your favorite coffee spot or cozy up on the couch and each of you create lists of things you must have at your wedding and things you would hate to see. This will be so helpful down the road!
Discuss how you want to involve family members or close friends. For example, what role do you want your future mother-in-law or your own mom to have? Once these pieces are discussed, express them to the appropriate people. Be honest with them. Letting them know ahead of time about how you see them fitting in through planning can avoid any conflict in the future.
When you do have different opinions (whether it’s colors, vendor choices, budget, anything), listen to each other’s ideas. It seems simple, I know. It’s a great opportunity to hear each other’s ideas and make compromises. I truly mean compromises too. When you have differing opinions, you can’t always get your way and regardless, there should be a high level of respect.
Ask for your fiance’s help when you need it. Maybe you need him to make time for cake tasting or you’d like him to have an opinion to help you decide on the color palette. Whatever it is, speak your mind and ask for help. Don’t feel bogged down alone. You’re in this together.
I’ve said this before, but set aside time for planning. This is crucial. When your future hubby is deep within a task, perhaps organizing your taxes or making dinner, that’s NOT the time to be talking about your wedding plans. Each of you need to be fully engaged in the conversation, not half listening (which I’m such a culprit of, ugh).
Above all, remember that this is your wedding day that you're planning! A beautiful day to celebrate the two of you! You should enjoy the preperation and don’t forget to delegate or hire help when it’s needed.